What do Imbolc and Valentine’s Day have in common?
They’re both celebrated at the start of spring in February, yes – but they share a more profound connection.
At Imbolc, the world is steeped in hope, fertility, growth, new beginnings, and eagerness for the abundance that lies ahead. In other words, the world and we once again awake to the effervescence of life.
Valentine’s Day celebrates love in all its forms. Love is the catalyst for new beginnings, hope, growth, and excellent quality of life.
If you struggle with relationships and don’t feel much loved, it could be that you lack self-love.
While many don’t realize it, we can’t properly love anyone else until we learn to love ourselves. Nor can we open ourselves up enough to receive real love.
Awakening self-love isn’t about bubble baths and comfort food, though. It’s embarking on an inner journey of self-discovery to find the radiant beauty within.
Why Do We Get It Wrong?
Today we live in a world of external stimulation that continually sends subtle messages of what we should be and what love is.
Because the media stream is so consistent, we become oblivious, but the subconscious mind still absorbs the communications.
From there, they transfer to the conscious mind and become thoughts that can take the form of negative self-talk. The inner dialogue could become more damaging if we were raised in an environment of criticism or involved in an unhappy relationship.
A lack of self-love may make us seek external love and approval, so we end up thinking that if someone else loves us, we’ll be worthy.
Sadly, looking for someone else to make us feel worthy is the wrong move, and we’ll always feel fragile and insecure. Sometimes, this opens us up to abuse, and we lose even more confidence.
Conversely, we might shun relationships and reject others because, deep down, we feel unworthy.
But what’s the solution to end this brutal cycle?
Self-love!
Learning self-love opens us to giving and receiving genuine love from everyone that matters in our lives.
Once we’re free of self-doubt, negative self-talk, and fear, we can love without clinging or resisting. As a result, we attract authentic love into our energy field.
Increase Self-Love with Crystals
Understandably, learning to love ourselves is a process that takes time. However, the more we work at it, the easier it becomes and the better we feel about ourselves.
To embrace self-love, we first have to learn self-compassion and self-forgiveness to let go of the past and walk into the future with hope and understanding.
Luckily Mother Earth is here to give a hand. From the depths of her womb come an array of crystals and stones that bring healing, comforting, loving, and strengthening energies.
Wear them daily as pendants close to your heart, pop them under your pillow at night or carry them as an amulet. Remember to cleanse and recharge your crystals regularly.
Here are a few powerfully loving healing stones:
Rose quartz
The gentle energy of this beautiful pink crystal resonates straight with the heart chakra – the center of all love. Despite its delicate appearance, rose quartz is a potent healer that exudes devoted love.
Reflecting the lovely shades of fragrant spring rose petals, rose quartz draws you into its warm embrace. Select one that attracts your attention and charge it with your intentions. Keep it with you always.
Amethyst
The purple hues of amethyst reflect rows of sweet-smelling violets or striking wisteria vines that herald in spring. Amethyst vibrates with the crown chakra’s energy – the connection to the world of spirit and the divine.
Regularly wearing amethyst opens you up to your higher self and divine guidance, allowing you to see past external deceptions into the beauty of who you really are. When you’re in touch with your soul, you become aware of spiritual love and connections.
Citrine
Wearing citrine is like capturing rays of sunshine and holding them close. It teaches you to recognize the joys in life, to enjoy being who you are and how to make lemonade when life dishes up lemons.
When you’re feeling down and in need of a boost, wear citrine! Citrine goes straight to the solar plexus chakra – your spirit center of self-esteem and confidence. Charge a crystal with your intentions and put it on a long chain or cord to keep it close to the solar plexus.
Hematite
Dressed in the deep colors of the night sky, hematite is your warrior stone. It’s a wise protector that nudges at you when you fall back on self-doubt, people-pleasing, and forgetting your actual worth.
Keeping this stone close by will help you rebuild your self-esteem and confidence, knowing that you deserve the best and new beginnings are on the horizon. Aligned with the base chakra, hematite keeps you grounded in reality.
Use Meditative Visualization
Visualization is a beautiful way to train the mind and manifest our intentions and desires.
Since Imbolc is a time for awakening and Valentine’s Day a time for love, it’s the perfect time to develop a meditation routine to grow your self-love.
Fragrances affect our mood, stress levels, and cognitive function. Using soothing scents during meditative visualization can deepen the effects by stimulating your senses.
Rose incense works marvelously for self-love, as do amber, jasmine, orange, and vanilla.
Keep your practice simple, so it’s easy to stick to and do daily. As you settle into your routine, it might change spontaneously. If it does, follow your intuition and allow the divine to guide you.
Choose a comfortable place where you won’t be disturbed. Cast a circle of protection around yourself and light tea lights and incense. Hold your healing crystal in your receiving, non-dominant hand and relax.
Invite divine energy into your circle and focus on your heart chakra. Visualize yourself brimming with confidence and feel self-love flowing from your heart, encircling you.
Just sit in this precious space of peace, self-acceptance, and love; bask in its comfort and harmony.
Don’t try to force anything, and allow the flow of divine energy to lead you. In time, you might start to find guidance and answers through meditation. If you do, remember to jot it down afterward so you can keep track of your healing journey.
All in all…
Awakening to self-love is more of a process than an event.
If you keep working at it, it will creep up on you, and when you look again, you’ll realize you’ve changed considerably.
You’ll feel much more comfortable in life and accept yourself, your journey, and what you want and don’t want.
As you embrace this new attitude, your confidence will grow, and you’ll attract your own kind of people into your life. When we find people who share our interests, values, and intention, we can’t go wrong.
Finally, we can be authentic and vulnerable with self-love and the right type of friends and partners, knowing we’re as safe and secure in their love as they are in ours.
Cleansing Self-Love Bath
Invariably, your past will raise its head on your healing journey. Often, the experiences that arise have contributed to a lack of self-love and self-confidence.
This is never pleasant, but you must face each incident that challenges you.
A cleansing bath is an excellent way to let go of past pain so that you can forgive yourself and others and move on.
When something that no longer serves you rears its head, look it in the eye and bring it into a cleansing self-love bath ritual.
What you’ll need:
- your healing crystal
- floral essential oil of your choice
- flower petals
- a bath sponge
What you’ll do:
- Know what you want to release.
- Add a few drops of essential oil to your bathwater.
- Sprinkle in the petals.
- Wear your healing crystal.
- Relax in the warm water while taking deep breaths.
- Allow the incident/person to come to mind.
- Sit with any discomfort that arises.
- Starting from your head, gently sponge yourself down.
- With each stroke, visualize the problem being washed away.
- You may want to sponge yourself down a few times.
- When you feel lighter, stand in the water.
- Feel the last dregs of the matter drain into your feet and the water.
- Step out of the bath and pull the plug.
- Watch the water disappear, visualizing the problem going with it.
- Gently dry your body from the head downwards.
- Feel the open spaciousness within.
- Then starting at your feet, briskly dry yourself again.
- Sense vibrant energy rising up inside of you.
- Embrace it with curiosity and anticipation.
- This moment is the start of your new beginning.
